Chapter 43: The Secret of the Xie Family

"You despicable woman, you still dare to threaten me. Even if I were to kill you and make you vanish without a trace, not a single person would dare to utter a word of inquiry."

He wants to kill me! He wants to kill me!
He wants to make me completely disappear from this world just like he did to my father and brothers, without anyone ever knowing.

Madam Guo struggled violently on the bed. Ashu said anxiously, "What should we do? Ah-Huan, Madam Guo still seems trapped within her own obsession and fear, unable to wake up."

"It's fine!" Murong Huan said, "Leave it to me!"

The white smoke transformed once again into wisps of thread, assaulting the anxiety and fear deep within Madam Guo's heart, causing her spirit to gradually steady.

"What are you afraid of? Since you are so afraid, why not leave him?"

"Why not leave? I have given too much to this household. Back then, to repay the debt of saving my life, I came to the Guo family with a dowry stretching ten miles and helped him enter officialdom. But I never expected that in the end, it was all a lie! I am not resigned! I am unwilling to accept that after sacrificing everything, I ended up with nothing at all, and even had my life turned into such a joke!"

"Put that way, you are simply resentful that your sacrifices did not receive a single shred of corresponding reward; you are merely seeking compensation for yourself. Yet, placing such hope and seeking recompense in others will only cause you to lose even more, sinking you ever deeper into this quagmire of failure. Since that is the case, why refuse to let go of yourself, and instead find another way to compensate yourself? Or rather, choose a different way of living?"

"A different way of living?" Madam Guo murmured within her dream as well.

"Yes, a different way of living. Since it is a failed life experience, one must cut one's losses in time, walk out of this gloom, and find oneself another path bathed in sunlight.

As Buddhist teachings state: to let go is to receive, which is the inevitable path of life. Although an erroneous choice has caused you to lose much, since you already know this is a losing bet, why not extricate yourself in time and seek another manifestation of your own worth? In truth, is this not another form of gain?"

"Break through the obsessed self, and only then will you see the light!"

"Break through the obsessed self, and only then will you see the light?"

Madam Guo murmured the phrase to herself several times, and tears streamed down the corners of her eyes in a cascade. In her dream, amidst a thousand miles of trudging through darkness, she gradually saw a sliver of light, much like a pair of hands slowly tearing open the boundless night sky, allowing endless golden light to bathe down upon her. Finally, she walked to the very end of the darkness.

...

At the same time, Xiao Muchen also jolted awake from that ethereal, illusory dreamland.

Although the dream was unreal, every single word Murong Huan had spoken echoed clearly in his ears.

"Break through the obsessed self, and only then will you see the light?"

Xiao Muchen could not help but murmur the phrase once more. As if abruptly returning to the real world, he cast his gaze toward Murong Huan again, only to see that she had stopped playing her vertical flute at some unknown moment. Yet despite the cessation, the sound of the flute seemed to still linger in his ears, stirring endless lingering affection and fantasy.

A single dream felt like the passing of an autumn. Seeing Murong Huan again, he experienced a sense of the world having changed, as if meeting her for the very first time.

So this was the junior sister whom he had never met, yet whose name his master so frequently mentioned!

Back then, when he begged his master for a portrait of this junior sister, his master had tested him by only painting her as a child, leaving him to guess what she would look like all grown up.

He truly had failed to recognize her. In this regard, he was truly inferior to Murong Huan.

"Oh, Imperial Censor Xiao, you're awake? Why did you fall asleep just now as well? I called your name several times, but you didn't hear a thing."

Ashu's voice interrupted his contemplation, and he suddenly realized that he had been hypnotized by Murong Huan's flute music. In his heart, he could not help but secretly marvel: This junior sister's hypnotic arts are truly remarkable; even I fell under her spell without realizing it.

At this moment, Madam Guo drew in a sharp breath and abruptly opened her eyes. Upon seeing the two of them, she first looked dazed, and then grew extremely vigilant.

"Who are you? Why are you in my courtyard?"

Murong Huan said, "I am the physician who just treated you, Madam Xie. Do you feel a bit better now?"

Addressing her as Madam Xie was a way of respecting her independent personality rather than burdening her with her husband's surname.

Madam Xie felt a slight warmth in her heart, as if she sensed a regained sense of recognized existence, and could not help but carefully examine Murong Huan's appearance: "You look... so much like someone I once knew? But you are not her! Was it you who told me just now: 'Break through the obsessed self, and only then will you see the light'?"

Upon hearing those first words, Murong Huan was slightly startled for a moment before replying:

"Yes! Madam, can you tell me why you are so afraid of your husband? Aside from the deep blood feud of him murdering your family?"

"Why?"

After issuing a bitter, self-mocking laugh, Madam Xie shed tears once more: "Because he has always wanted me to die! Though I am his wedded principal wife, he has never once regarded me as his wife, nor has he ever trusted me! Even his concubines could become his confidantes, sharing secrets with him, while I was perpetually ignored by him and even belittled. He constantly brought up my appearance and my merchant background, making me utterly devoid of confidence and dignity in his presence. For a very long time, I even doubted myself, wondering if I truly was unworthy of him, and if I owed him everything...

Until one day, when I accidentally overheard a secret he was discussing with his retainer. Only then did I realize how many heinous deeds he had committed, and how immense his ambitions were. Although I managed to escape at the time without him discovering me, he remained suspicious of me ever since, and even wanted to kill me."

"A secret? What secret?" Xiao Muchen could not help but ask.

Madam Xie clearly grew guarded.

Murong Huan hurriedly pulled Xiao Muchen's hand, signaling him not to interrogate her further, and instead offered gentle persuasion: "Madam Xie, between husband and wife, no one is ever unworthy of the other. If he made you feel this way, it only proves that he deliberately sought to control you, turning you into a slave who submitted and obeyed his every command.

Every single one of us living in this world has value, Madam Xie. You have your own worth as well, and even advantages that others cannot match. The fact that he could not see them only proves that he is unsuited for you, and indeed, entirely unworthy of you."

"Is that true? I too have advantages others cannot match, and worth in this world?"

"Yes. Madam Xie, only when you cherish yourself can you make others respect you. Therefore, stop doubting yourself."

A trace of relieved smiling finally bloomed on Madam Xie's face. Looking at Murong Huan's face, she gazed upon her with the yearning usually reserved for an old friend.

"Young master, what is your name?" she suddenly asked.

"Murong Huan."

"Murong? Your surname is actually Murong?"

Murong Huan was also momentarily stunned and asked, "Could it be that you also know my mother?"

At this question, Madam Xie seemed to be guarding against something and fell silent once again.

Murong Huan did not dwell on the matter further, simply saying: "Madam Xie, I understand your current predicament, and I imagine you understand it quite well yourself. If you continue to keep secrets for this husband of yours, it is very likely you will not live to see tonight.

Therefore, right now, you only have the choice to cooperate with us. This Imperial Censor Xiao is an official of the Censorate, and he will uphold justice for you. You do not need to fear your husband."

Madam Xie looked toward Xiao Muchen.

Xiao Muchen had no choice but to speak up: "What she said is true. I can indeed uphold justice for you, including redressing the grievances you wish to voice. However, before that, Madam Xie must truthfully answer a few questions for me."

"Please go ahead, Imperial Censor Xiao."

"The two concubines newly taken by Guo Erlang were murdered at the hour of the horse yesterday noon. Can you guess who the murderer might be?"

Hearing abruptly that the two concubines had been murdered, a look of incredulous shock surfaced in Madam Xie's eyes.

"What did you say? They're dead? Impossible, how could they die? How did they die?"

"That is what we must ask you. Why do you think they died?"

Madam Xie's face turned pale, her entire body stiffening once again as she found herself momentarily unable to speak. Tears streamed down her face in an instant, and echoes seemed to ring endlessly in her ears.

"Aunt, as a daughter of the Xie family, you must avenge this blood debt owed to our entire clan. If you will not do it, then Ah-Ying and I will."

"These cruel officials have no humanity. For the sake of their own single fortunes, they let thousands of families be ruined and left to suffer."

"Why not expose their crimes?"

"Aunt, I refuse to believe that having been married to him for so many years, you cannot find even a shred of evidence of his crimes?"

...

Madam Xie felt a sudden buzzing in her head, and unable to stop herself, she covered her ears and sobbed in a low voice.

"It was my fault! I shouldn't have let them come to Luoyang, I shouldn't have let them come... I was selfish!"

After weeping for a long while, Madam Xie finally raised her head to look at Murong Huan and Xiao Muchen: "Very well, I agree to cooperate with you. What else do you want me to do?"