Chapter 146: How Terrifying

“What? You, demon, would presume to debate Buddhism with me?” The little monk shook his head. His movements were stiff, like a mummy freshly dug from the grave, still unaccustomed to life among the living.

His neck twisted with a dry crackle, but it was not the sound of ordinary bones. It was more like the creaking of a window with a broken hinge.

“A demon dares say such things? You protect Heaven, but has Heaven ever treated you kindly?”

“One day, a god will descend upon a heavenly ladder. She will wash away the sins of the mortal world.”

“Is that all you have to say to me?” The monk tossed away the veiled hat atop his head.

A layer of green stubble had already sprouted there—newly grown hair. He pointed at the cassock on his body. “This is how I make my living. If I weren’t poor, I wouldn’t believe in this sort of thing either.”

The old woman seemed utterly stunned. She glared at him viciously, then leaped down from the roof beam and dragged the worried old man back up with her. Holding him hostage, she said, “He’s a living, breathing human being. I’ll kill him right now.”

“What does that have to do with me?” The little monk sat cross-legged on the ground. “How many people die in this world every day? Go ahead and kill him.”

“Old woman, run! Run quickly! I’m the one who brought this upon you! I shouldn’t have brought him here to see you. I shouldn’t have been greedy. You said a monk’s flesh was delicious, and I really went and caught one.”

“Oh…” The monk smiled meaningfully. Just when the old woman thought she had enraged him, he closed his eyes again. “I can’t see anything!”

The old woman: “…”

“Old woman, I’ve heard monks aren’t allowed to see blood. Is that—”

“Enough. I’m not a monk anymore.” The monk removed his outer cassock, revealing a Taoist robe beneath. Somehow, he produced a horsetail whisk and brushed it over his shoulder. “Any other questions?”

The old man rubbed his eyes and stared at him in disbelief. “Old woman, I—I must be seeing things. I…”

“Go to hell!”

The old woman thrust out her long tongue. The instant it shot forward, it pierced straight through the old man’s chest and lungs.

“Old woman!” Reaching out, the old man seemed to want to touch her face one last time. But the old woman had long since become a demon. How could she still possess a heart?

Seeing him like that, she instead laughed in satisfaction. “Look closely. This is humanity.”

“Mm. That makes three times.” The little monk nodded in agreement.

The old woman continued muttering like a lecturer. “Humans… They really are fragile. How could they possibly compare with our great Lord Mang?”

“Lord Mang?” The little monk pricked up his ears.

The wooden fish in his hand, which he had been tapping in a steady rhythm, became disordered. Its tinkling beat changed from a simple ding-dong to a clattering ding-dong-dong. The old woman seemed to have vented some of her resentment and glared at him angrily. “Where is your compassion?”

“Last time I met a demon who said he was hungry, so I let him eat me.”

The old woman’s repulsive face was so distorted that her nose and eyes could no longer be distinguished. It looked like a mass of bloody dough. Fortunately, she pushed it upward with her hands, barely keeping it from collapsing completely.

“Enough!” The wooden fish in the monk’s hands beat faster. Ding-dong-dong became ding-ding-dong; ding-ding-dong became dong-dong-dong-dong-ding. The rhythm grew fierce and emphatic.

The old woman, who had been preparing to sneer at him, promptly shut her mouth.

“Did you enjoy that tune? This humble monk happens to be a sound cultivator. I studied something utterly useless, and I never know when it will finally come in handy.”

The old woman seemed to realize what was happening. She was just about to leap from the roof beam when flames suddenly rose around her body.

A wind seemed to have stirred in the sky.

Sparse flakes of yellow paper drifted down, as though pitying this crumbling mortal world.

“Look!” A tear fell onto the old woman’s face, which resembled a lump of flesh squeezed out with a spoon. “The funeral rites for Lord Mang have begun.”

“…”

This time, the little monk was truly flustered.

The one thing he could be certain of was that Lord Mang himself would not appear. But the paper offerings falling from the sky really were not being thrown by him!

“Master… Was this your doing?”

“Wicked… son.”

“I can be even worse.” The little monk gave a humph and jumped down from the roof beam.

As expected, only a human-shaped outline remained on the ground. The old man had disappeared. When he turned his head, the flames around the lump of flesh that had been dancing on the roof beam were gone as well. She had even escaped, bounding away full of life.

“Twin blossoms. It must have used twin blossoms. Whenever danger comes, it transfers its primary life to the other flower. Demons won’t be afraid of these little tricks of mine. How did I not think of that?”

“Wicked… disciple. No. Permission.”

“Master, what you’re saying now is like a mountain breeze to me. When it blows, all I feel is comfort, not intimidation. It would be best if you did this every day.”

“Wicked… disciple.”

“Master, please take pity on me! My junior brother watched you die. If you don’t return, he’ll go on being mad forever. I finally managed to send him off to find the most reliable person there is. Surely you don’t want me to think about him, do you?”

The voice seemed to vanish. For a long while, there was no reply.

The little monk paid it no mind. Instead, he stood before the tree in the courtyard.

“They all call me the Buddha of Good and Evil. I find it difficult to distinguish right from wrong in this mortal world. The only thing I can do is act according to my own preferences. The moment I entered this courtyard, I laid down…”

“Hmm?”

The little monk looked toward the sky. In his panic, he pulled a cassock from his storage pouch and draped it over himself, then put his veiled hat back on. In an instant, he looked like an entirely different person.

He was certain that the monstrous husband and wife were hiding inside the tree in the courtyard. When he had entered, the deathly aura around that tree had been the strongest. Now, it had grown denser still.

The reason he was being so cautious was that someone was breaking his formation from outside. Moreover, it seemed that someone in the sky was watching this place as well.

The aura of the intruder outside was peculiar. Demonic energy hung in the air all around, but the person leading the attack…

The instant the formation shattered, the little monk dropped to his knees. He tightened his grip on his staff.

Was the newcomer friend or foe?

“The Old Ancestor is almost here. Clean everything up quickly.”

“Got it, Master! Just watch me!”

A fiery young woman charged into the courtyard, ignoring him completely as she split the tree apart with a single palm strike.

The great tree’s heartwood had long since rotted. Unable to withstand her force, it burst into fragments.

It was as though the tree had been washed away by a violent storm. Torn up by the roots, it revealed numerous corpses wrapped in white cloth beneath them. The stench of death rushed into the air, and the little monk instinctively held his breath.

“If you think it smells bad, why were you sitting there? Honestly, you’re such a blockhead!” The girl smiled, then glanced at her expressionless master. “Master, I’ve finally met someone even stupider than me.”

Wen Xueshan gave him an indifferent glance. “He isn’t stupid. He’s pretending.”

The little monk: “…”

“Master… Couldn’t you praise me for once?”

Wen Xueshan seemed to remember something and folded her arms, stepping farther away from him. “I already praised you. And then you went and roasted yourself for fun again?”

“Then, Master!” The girl raised her sword and thrust it toward the two dying elders. “Isn’t it because you like watching me kill you?”

A storm of astonishment swept through the little monk’s heart.

How frightening! Both master and servant were ruthless people!